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Welcome to The Innovative Professional's (TIP's) Letter!
Sunday, June 8, 2003
Written & Published by Philip E. Humbert, PhD
Visit our website at: http://www.philiphumbert.com


Table of Contents:

1. The One-Minute TIP
2. Welcome Notes
3. Do You Choose Pleasure or Gratification?
4. Quotes of the Week
5. Strictly Business:   
6. Resources and Tools for YOUR Success!
7. Humor: How To Stay Young 

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============================================
1. The One-Minute TIP

If you desire to celebrate life and feel good and know joy,
mix small amounts of pleasure (chocolate, a few roller-
coaster rides) with large blocks of time devoted to
pursuing your dreams. Self-discipline, focus, commitment
and dedication ultimately lead to joy. Chocolate (I love
the stuff!) ultimately leads to satiation and regret, while
dedicated, persistent effort on projects that are worthy of
our highest aspirations, leads to "the good life". The
choice is yours. Which would you rather have?


============================================
2. Welcome Notes

            *** IMPORTANT ***

We are getting more and more emails about undelivered
issues of TIPS and almost all of them are because our
valued subscribers are installing spam filters and mail
blocks. Every week we receive many emails from AOL
subscribers, in particular.

To be sure you receive TIPS and other newsletters you
subscribe to, PLEASE do three things:

1. List the publisher's name and email address in your
address book. This is essential if you use AOL, MSN, or any
of the web-based email services, or if you use an email
address where your company may install a spam filter.
Please create a listing for:

    Philip Humbert             Coach@philiphumbert.com

2. Double-check your "options" and "settings" to be sure
you allow the newsletters you enjoy to get through! And,
remember to check your "junk" file periodically for any
emails (personal as well as newsletters) that might have
been caught by mistake.

3. Third, please do NOT use the so-called "Challenge/Response"
services unless you can specifically place us on your "approved"
list. SpamArrest(tm) is probably the largest, but Earthlink(sm) has
announced their own program. These systems threaten email
newsletters because publishers cannot possibly respond to the
hundreds of requests for verification. If you wish to receive a
newsletter, mine or anyone else's, you must configure your
system so you can receive it.

We are all swamped with spam. Personally, I get between 200
and 300 a day, and it's a huge nuisance, but I love
publishing TIPS and hope we can continue. Unfortunately,
many spam "solutions" create problems of their own and I
view the "Challenge/Response" systems, in particular, as
extremely cumbersome. Please avoid them.

With that unpleasantness out of the way, we've had a
wonderful week of hot weather. We set several record high
temperatures here in Oregon this week, and the golf has
been fantastic! I hope wherever you are, you are also
having a wonderful time! And to everyone - dozens of you! -
who sent such wonderful notes of appreciate for last week's
TIPS about Annika Sorentsam, Thank You! You can always
review that at:  http://philiphumbert.com/TIPS


============================================
3:  Do You Choose Pleasure or Gratification?

I recently read Martin Seligman's excellent new book,
"Authentic Happiness" and he makes a wonderful and vital
distinction. Would you rather experience pleasure, or
gratification?

It's an interesting question because our culture has
clearly chosen pleasure. Going back to Sigmund Freud's
argument that behavior is guided by our desire to avoid
pain and maximize pleasure, modern society has voted for
pleasure. Interestingly, Seligman argues that this is
ultimately futile, and I would argue that it is ultimately
self-defeating.

First, Seligman's argument, as I understand it.

Almost all pleasures are most intense when experienced in
moderation. He points out that if we eat chocolates one at
a time, our pleasure sky-rockets. But if we eat them one
after another, we soon lose our sense of pleasure, and if
we are forced to continue eating, we quickly tire of them
and may even get sick.

This is true of almost all pleasures. Think of being
stuffed with your favorite food, or having to endure a back
massage that lasted for days and days on end. Even sex is
exhausting after a certain point.

The point is that while pleasure - good food, good wine,
good friends, etc - is a wonderful addition to life, our
society has taken the quest for pleasure beyond the point
of rapidly diminishing returns. We seek more and more toys,
more and more pleasures in a never-ending quest to be
entertained, and ultimately these "pleasures" cannot
sustain us. The data are clear. The evidence is in:
Pleasure for its own sake does not work!

Here's just one specific: When people are measured while
they watch comedies on television, even while they are
laughing, their actual emotional state shows a mild level
of depression! Think about that, and it's implications!

Interestingly, however, when we substitute "gratification"
or "fulfillment" for pleasure, our sense of happiness
dramatically increases, and the increase remains over the
long term!

Seligman defines gratification as the fulfillment of our
values or the completion of long-term goals or purposes,
and he describes research that people who have invested
themselves in the achievement of long-term goals are far
happier than those who have primarily sought pleasure or
fun.

Isn't it interesting when science eventually catches up
with the wisdom of the ages? From the beginning of time,
our religious leaders, poets and seers have advised us to
spend our lives on things that will outlast us and to
invest ourselves in the fulfillment of our dreams, rather
than the pleasures of the moment.

Now, it turns out, science agrees!

If you desire to celebrate life and feel good and know joy,
mix small amounts of pleasure (chocolate, a few roller-
coaster rides) with large blocks of time devoted to
pursuing your dreams. Self-discipline, focus, commitment
and dedication ultimately lead to joy. Chocolate (I love
the stuff!) ultimately leads to satiation and regret, while
dedicated, persistent effort on projects that are worthy of
our highest aspirations, creates "the good life". The
choice is yours. Which would you rather have?

Pursue gratification. It's the ultimate high!


============================================
4. Quotes of the Week

"Be faithful in small things because it is in them that
your strength lies."
                                   -- Mother Teresa

"In our daily lives, we must see that it is not happiness
that makes us grateful, but the gratefulness that makes us happy."
                                   -- Albert Clarke

"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness
has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now."
                                   -- Goethe

"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win
you're still a rat."
                                   -- Lily Tomlin


============================================
5. Strictly Business:  

The business books and schools say the main reason
businesses fail is a lack of capital, and based on the
numbers, they may be correct, but they are not "right". As
I work with entrepreneurs and small businesses there is a
far more important factor that easily separates those who
"make it" from those who fail.

When I work with owners and managers and leaders, I can
usually detect the difference in our very first
conversation. If you are primarily in business to make
money, to create a personal asset or for any of a hundred
other reasons, I believe your odds of eventually failing go
way, way up.

There is ONLY ONE REASON to be in business:
To SERVE the customer!

Of course, profits are essential for the long-term future
of the company, but that is a secondary RESULT of a well-
run business. The PURPOSE must be to serve the customer, to
give the customer value, to solve their problems, meet
their needs, and exceed their expectations.

One of the most exciting examples has been Southwest
Airlines. One of the first "no frills" airlines, it is also
about the only profitable airline in the country. Why?
People LIKE flying Southwest! It's convenient. It's cheap.
The flight attendants seem to enjoy their work, and they
have the freedom to make decisions, solve problems and
serve the customer. It works, and it makes money.

To grow your business, focus on the customer. One customer,
well served, can be worth a fortune to you, your business,
and your future.

Want to know more? I've partnered with JoAnna Brandi, the
world's leading expert on "Exquisite Customer Care" to
provide a 90-minute live seminar on Tuesday, June 17th.
Talk about customer care! She's provided over $80 of
written materials, plus her LIVE presentation, and it's a
bargain! Space will go quickly, so take action and register today!
http://philiphumbert.com/Expert.htm



============================================
6. Resources and Tools for YOUR Success!

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build your business or professional practice, and it
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============================================
7. Humor:  How to Stay Young 

My friend and periodic "humor source", Richard Ross (at
http://www.emotionalfreedom.com) sent me some quotes from
George Carlin, which were great, but he attached his own
Top 10 ways to stay young, and with due respect for Carlin,
I thought these were even better. Enjoy!

How to Stay Young:

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age,
weight and height. Let the doctor worry about them. That
is why you pay him/her.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts,
gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle
mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is
Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for
breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only
person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be
ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's
family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it
is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve,
get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the
next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every
opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but
by the moments that take our breath away.



============================================

Be kind to yourself and to someone else, and have a
wonder-FULL week!



Philip E. Humbert, PhD,
Resources for Success!
tm
President, The Philip E. Humbert Group, Inc.


Shameless Marketing TIP:
Dr Humbert is a professional coach, author and popular
speaker. Ready to achieve more? Imagine what's possible
with a coach! For info and over 250 pages of tips,
tools, humor and resources for your success, visit:
www.philiphumbert.com.

Copyright (c) 2003, all rights reserved.
U.S. Library of Congress ISSN: 1529-059X
You may copy, forward or distribute TIP's if this
copyright notice and full information for contacting
Dr Philip E. Humbert are included. Contact him at:
www.philiphumbert.com or email:  Coach@philiphumbert.com.

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